“What Are You Doing This For?”

Processed with VSCO with j5 preset

Processed with VSCO with j5 preset


I’m an open book. I’m always happy to share my story, my process, my challenges, really anything you can think of I’ll share honestly. Being asked this questions about training for Naturalmania 2017, “What are you doing this for?” Had me stop and take pause. “What the hell AM I doing this for?”


There are a few major factors to consider here; until I was 22 I weighed nearly 200 lbs, I was brought up believing that we grow physically decrepit as we age and lastly I’m not willing to be basic. Combine all of these and you end up with me; a FIERCE woman always searching to be the best physical version of herself each and every year.

About 5 years ago (when I was 35) I began looking at athletes over 70 who had been training in their sport for nearly all of their lifetimes. Now please don’t take offense, these are my opinions and how I chose my path. To me, even  the most successful runners looked frail and older than their age as if they’d literally “weathered the storm” of all those miles. With joint and back pain, running was a sport that I decided wasn’t for me for the long haul, I used to take a pain relief medication but still did not feel ready to run.  Then I looked at something more gentle on the body and joints and that would be a challenge for me, swimming. Many who swam solely as their form of training had poor posturing and a majority had kyfosis (rounded backs), again not my ideal. I kept searching and when I looked at physique competitors I was astounded. Bodybuilding is a sport in which you get better at physically over time. The more time you have the more muscle mass you can gain. Being so mindful and specific of the food you must eat and what it does to your physique, the better you know your body and comfortable you get in your own skin. The confidence you have to present  on stage, perfecting your look and your body year over year… I was IN.

Two years ago when I competed for the first time I was doing it to see what my body could do and mostly to not look a fool on stage. To tell you the entire truth I was petrified and miserable  the entire time I trained. I was hungry, I was sore and worst of all I was a total b!#ch. Literally when anyone would ask how I was doing my auto-response was, “I’m sore and tired.” Trust that this wasn’t my finest moment.

The long story to the short question “Why are you doing this?” is that I’m doing this this year to prove that I can do it better than before and ENJOY THE PROCESS. Not everyone has a healthy body, I knew I needed to be grateful to challenge my physical capacity every day. I have to say that if this is my goal this go round, I’m winning! I’ve done this through joy and appreciation. It’s not as big a deal as it was last time, some say it’s because I’ve done  it before, but I know that it’s what I’m focused on. Gratitude and ease is what I was striving for and  it’s what I’ve gotten. (Well, except to my trainer I complain to him, but that’s when he makes  me lift extra heavy and I love him for that.)


I say it in my classes and I remind myself of it come cardio time, I have legs that work, there are people who would give anything to have my able body. This thought keeps me in a space of gratitude for the body I have. It’s not easy by any means, shifting my mind or the physical work, but I do have to say that being IN JOY is a much better place to come from than the cranky B I was last time around.


I’m looking forward to riding with you this week! Check out my schedule below if you want to get  your SWERVE on with me this week. To set up a private personal training session, nutritional counseling or meditation for you or a group message me  HERE.


6:30AM Cycling, SWERVE, 21 West 46th Street Register HERE

7:30AM Cycling, SWERVE, 21 West 46th Street Register HERE


6:00AM Cycling, SWERVE, 30 West 18th Street Register HERE

5:30PM Cycling, SWERVE, 21 West 46th Street Register HERE

6:30PM Cycling, SWERVE, 21 West 46th Street Register HERE


7:30AM Cycling, SWERVE, 21 West 46th Street Register HERE

12:30PM Cycling, SWERVE, 21 West 46th Street Register HERE


7:00AM Cycling, SWERVE, 30 West 18th Street Register HERE 

8:00AM Cycling, SWERVE, 30 West 18th Street Register HERE 


8:15AM Cycling, SWERVE, 30 West 18th Street Register HERE 

9:30AM Cycling, SWERVE, 30 West 18th Street Register HERE